Updated 2026-06-03 | Published 2026-06-02
READER QUESTION: I have bought a house, and my partner and I are going to move in together in the house I have bought. Cohabitation agreement is on g, but I wonder: How should we distribute the expenses? Is it reasonable to charge some kind of “rent” for him to live in my house? I own the house, but he had paid rent to a landlord.
ANNIFRID’S ANSWER: Congratulations on both the house purchase and that you are moving in together! When you move into a house that only one of you owns, you find yourself in a somewhat special, but not unusual, situation. It is your joint home in practice, but legally and financially only one of you is the owner.
First: Remember the cohabitation agreement
You write that you have a cohabitation agreement in the works, which is great.
Without the cohabitation agreement, the home must be divided equally between you if you separate, even though you alone own the home.
Therefore, make sure to have it in place as soon as possible. If you were to separate, it risks becoming a tough situation for you.
This is a cohabitation agreement
A legally binding agreement that regulates how joint property is to be distributed in the event of separation or death.
Shared property is only shared housing and household goods purchased for joint use. Other assets such as savings, holiday home, car or home that were bought before you became a couple are not joint property and should not be shared.
Cohabitation agreements become especially important when one party has invested more money in the cash investment, when you own the home with different shares, or when one party owns the entire home but it is purchased for joint use.
Separate housing costs and rent
It’s easy to think in terms of paying “rent” – your partner would have had to pay for their accommodation somewhere anyway. When you live together, it is of course completely reasonable that both contribute to the housing costs, one should not live for free or get a free ride on the other just because he does not own the home.
At the same time, I think there is a difference between paying rent to an external landlord and sharing your joint housing costs. A market rent often includes more than just the cost of living somewhere. It also includes compensation to the owner for the risk they take, for repayments on loans, and for future maintenance and renovations that can increase the home’s value.
A landlord often rents out the home to make money, while in a love relationship that is hopefully not the main purpose.
If your partner pays more than a “market rent” to you, it helps to build your equity, while your partner receives no value-building in return.
It is like a gift to you.
Over time, this can mean a clear financial imbalance between you: You who own the house gradually become richer, while your partner makes it possible at the expense of his own savings and his own financial security.
Of course, this does not mean that the partner should not contribute financially.
However, there is a difference between sharing real costs and paying a rent that also gives the owner a financial gain at the expense of his partner.
Which costs should we share?
Instead of thinking in terms of “rent”, it may be fairer to think in terms of what costs are connected to the home. The costs can be divided into two parts:
Costs of living in the house: Running costs for things that you both actually use and benefit from when you live there together.
They are linked to the accommodation itself, not to ownership. This could be, for example, electricity, heating, fees to the association if you live in a condominium, water and sewage, garbage collection and other operating costs.
It can also be argued that the interest cost of the mortgage belongs in this category.
These costs are perfectly reasonable to share. How you then choose to divide the accommodation costs between you may look different. Some choose to share operating costs 50/50, others choose to share percentage based on income.
Costs linked to ownership: Costs connected to one of you actually owning the home and building a long-term value in it.
It could be, for example, mortgage repayments, which in practice are savings, or major renovations that contribute to an increase in value. These are costs that are reasonable for you, the owner of the home, to cover yourself.
The bottom line: Your partner should help pay to live in the house, but not pay for your ownership. The point is that both should be able to build a healthy and reasonable economy over time without one financing the other’s investments, and at the same time not taking a cheap ride.
If you need to share costs connected to the ownership, it is often more fair to instead review whether your partner will buy into the house in the long term and take a real share of the ownership.
Ask Annifrid about private finances
Annifrid Lilja is a lawyer and new economics profile in Aftonbladet. Here she will answer questions about personal finances, cohabitation, family law and everyday financial problems. Want to ask a question? Email to fraga.annifrid@aftonbladet.se
